DEAR PARKLAND – how to say

I’ve heard variations on a theme –

  • Mom, if I die, I love you
  • I don’t know if I said ‘I love you’ to him this morning
  • I love you… I love you

If I have seen an all-pervading theme in this whole unspeakable tragedy, it has been LOVE… love in families, friends, professionals.  And that love is producing such strength, especially in the survivors.

My son died a few years ago. We all knew his illness was terminal, so we could prepare… and so could he.  He was a physician, musician, father, husband, son, brother, writer, athlete – a true renaissance man, as one friend put it. I want to share one of his poems with you:

How to Say
(May 24, 2009)

The way to say “I love you” to someone
is to say “I love you” to that person
This has come to my attention
“I love you” means “I love you”
and merits
being said
to the person
for whom you feel that love

Various gestures and clipped phrases
do not
say “I love you”

As lovely as a home-cooked casserole
or cheque for some needed money
or gift certificate for an indulgence
and is loving, nurturing, caring

It is not the same as saying
“I love you”
it is not

“Love ya’” or “You’re my girl”
or “You’re the best wife, mother, daughter”
or some Hallmark equivalent
nice and perhaps true

But it is not the same as saying
“I love you”

Do not mistake a gesture for the
declaration of love
nor heavy sentiment for its
clear articulation

Do not misjudge the brevity
of our existence
in missing the opportunity to say
“I love you”

Nor misjudge the simplicity of the
clear statement
with empty blathering, over-repetition
to meaninglessness

Do not wait until your voice has dried
and your sunken eyes
mournfully cry “I love you”

Do not wait until your deathbed
or someone else’s

Do not give expression to love
in the heat of passion
nor as an act of contrition

Like any real gift, give expression
freely, under no duress,
with no sense of obligation
or awkward burden

Tell all those that you love
that you love them
not just your spouse, your lover,
your beloved

Tell them now or certainly soon

Say to each person that you truly love,
where your mutual love
is a bond beyond
the nature of an ordinary relationship,

“I love you”

For the only way to do this
I know
The only way to say “I love you” to someone
is to say “I love you”

[from I am Keats as you areLink: Glenn Peirson]

Put to music by Jeff Enns

sung by Jennifer Enns Modolo

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Yeshua “RISEN” – a gem on Netflix

Here’s a treasure for you for Lent, if you practice it, and for simply meditating, if you follow another nurturing spiritual persuasion. I found it on one of my “by chance” explorations of Netflix, and almost didn’t choose to watch it It’s a simple story of the last days of Jesus, with the most believable, accurate Jesus (Cliff Curtis) I’ve ever seen.

There’s a good, brief review here:

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Another Kind of Olympics

THE BRAIN is wider than the sky,
For, put them side by side,
The one the other will include
With ease, and you beside.

I’ve been watching the Senate Intelligence Committee and the FBI discussing… yes, I’m saying it was discussing, rather than testifying and interrogating, because it was fascinating and mutual, as much as was wise to allow.

Forget the current White House story about Porter. That will take care of itself.

What was most compelling is that Russia’s interference in the election (and ongoing politics that it will reach into future politics) are all a given.  Everyone knows and accepts that fact.

What is even more fascinating is that China is a force to be reckoned with, especially in the fields of AI (artificial intelligence) and QC (quantum computing). Why? Because the USA is far behind in these fields… too much blah, blah on trade, the wall, immigration, etc.

The brain is deeper than the sea,
For, hold them, blue to blue,
The one the other will absorb,
As sponges, buckets do.

If I were some kind of billionaire, I’d be setting up my own university/college in these fields – where we would create and move ahead in the world AI and QC. I would find the best students and give them scholarships and residences. I would create the most innovative and structured Board ever and … tada! How exciting would that be? It could even encourage robotics and research in medicine and cyber warfare. If only I could be Oprah or Bill Gates for the time needed!

Encourage your best, Canadian high schools and universities and colleges. Go after the money needed. Just do it!

More to the point, start supporting:

The USA is all lost in so-called politics. Someone has to keep up and even ahead in AI and QC.  And Canada has a great reputation.

The brain is just the weight of God,
For, lift them, pound for pound,
And they will differ, if they do,
As syllable from sound

Emily Dickinson…. of course…



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the shape of water… life? evil? love? music? poetry?

 I saw it last night and don’t know how to give words to the mute poetry of it all.  I, a swimmer, immersed myself in it.  Perhaps the whole idea is that once the solitary journey is over, I will never surface.  Nor will I want to.  I shall go from here to there where I will breathe with the aid of love, music, poetry. Not air. Eternity is breathing submerged in water.

I wondered about Desplat as I fell under the spell of the very first note. And he is the composer… of the original music… and my mood.

All I can say is – go, sink, stay… until you’ve got it figured out. And then will come the door to Home.

Unable to perceive the shape of You,
I find You all around me.
Your presence fills my eyes with Your love,
It humbles my heart,
For You are everywhere.

[del Toro, under the influence of Rumi]


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